Life is full of choices. Every day, we make big and small decisions that shape our paths. However, among these decisions, one of the most important divides is the struggle between what we want and need. While these terms may seem similar, they represent different forces in our lives, and understanding the distinction between them is key to leading a more fulfilling life.
Tamara Morgan’s book, The Keys We Hold, explores this struggle. Through her journey of self-reflection and growth, she dives deep into the tension between superficial desires and deeper, more essential needs. This reflection offers a valuable lesson for anyone trying to make sense of their own choices and the underlying motivations that drive them.
The Difference Between Want and Need
At its core, want is often driven by instant gratification. Wants are the things we desire on the surface: the shiny new car, the latest fashion trend, or a social media that boosts our ego. These desires are usually shaped by external influences – what we see around us, what we are told is valuable, and what society deems important. While these things may bring momentary joy, they are fleeting. Once we get them, we find ourselves looking for the next thing to fill the void.
On the other hand, need is rooted in something deeper. Needs are the things that nourish our spirit, mind, and body. These are the essentials we can’t live without – the need for genuine connection, personal growth, peace of mind, or self-love. Needs are more fundamental. They don’t change with trends or seasons but reflect what we require to live a balanced, healthy, and meaningful life.
In The Keys We Hold, Tamara Morgan reflects on her journey and how distinguishing between her wants and needs was pivotal in her self-healing process. Early in her life, she was consumed by wants – the need for validation, the desire for material success, and the pursuit of external markers of happiness. Yet, she soon realized that none of these desires fulfilled her meaningfully. Her true need wasn’t something material or fleeting but rather something internal – a need for self-love, self-reflection, and spiritual connection.
The Consequences of Ignoring Our Needs
When we confuse wants with needs, the consequences can be profound. For example, chasing after superficial or temporary things might feel rewarding at the moment, but it doesn’t offer lasting fulfillment. In The Keys We Hold, Tamara recounts moments of emotional exhaustion and frustration, where she realized that her life choices were more focused on the external things she “wanted” rather than what she truly needed.
This imbalance between want and need often leads to a cycle of dissatisfaction. For example, people who focus solely on external achievements may accumulate wealth or status but still feel empty. This emptiness can manifest as anxiety, depression, or a sense of disconnection from others. Conversely, focusing on the things that truly matter—such as emotional well-being, fulfilling relationships, and personal growth—brings a sense of peace and contentment that no material object can provide.
Tamara’s story is one of awakening, as she learned that the real key to unlocking a life of fulfillment was aligning her choices with her true needs, not her wants. By understanding and prioritizing her need for faith, self-care, and emotional healing, she could make choices that created lasting change in her life.
Recognizing the Difference Can Lead to Better Decisions
The difference between what we want and need doesn’t have to be a complicated philosophical concept. It’s something we can start recognizing in our everyday decisions. For instance, next time you’re about to make a purchase, ask yourself: Is this something I truly need, or is it just something I want in this moment to feel good? The same goes for relationships. Are you investing time in people who help you grow and support your well-being, or are you simply seeking validation from people who don’t care about your happiness?
Tamara’s experience shows that recognizing want and need is not just about avoiding bad decisions. It’s about being intentional with your choices. When you focus on meeting your true needs – emotional healing, time for reflection, or building meaningful connections – your decisions align with your long-term happiness. This shift can lead to clarity, peace, and a sense of fulfillment that no material item can replace.
The Power of Fulfilling Our Needs
Ultimately, the key takeaway from The Keys We Hold is that prioritizing our needs over our wants can unlock a deeper, more meaningful life. When we start listening to our inner voice, paying attention to what our soul is asking for, and acting in accordance with our actual needs, we begin to feel more grounded and whole. We stop chasing after things that don’t matter and start nurturing the aspects of ourselves that make us truly alive.
We live in a world of distractions and pressures, but remember to ask ourselves one simple question – What do I truly need? – it can change the way we approach life. Whether practicing self-love, building a meaningful career, or fostering deeper relationships, fulfilling our needs will always bring more lasting satisfaction than any desire.
As Tamara Morgan shows us in her book, the struggle between want and need is universal. Yet, by consciously embracing our true needs, we can navigate life with more clarity, wisdom, and fulfillment. The keys to a more satisfying life are already within us; we must learn to listen.